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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 20:50:10 GMT -5
Marie Hynes, 73, saw in her newspaper that her former husband, John Gonsalves Sr., 71, had won $5.1 million in the Massachusetts state lottery. Hynes “deserves” some of the booty, she says, and has filed a claim in family court asking for back child support for their three sons through the age of 21 and unspecified alimony. Gonsalves had left her in 1946; their youngest child is 51. He will receive $170,000 per year until the year 2013. (AP) ...At least she doesn’t hold a grudge.
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 20:52:25 GMT -5
Jeremiah Johnson appeared in court in Polk County, Fla., but the bailiff told him he couldn’t wear shorts in front of the judge. So Johnson went out, took them off, and came back in. “He was butt naked,” Judge Michael Raiden said later. “He was making a statement, I guess.” The judge made a statement too: 179 days in jail for contempt of court. (AP) ...I thought justice was supposed to be blind.
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 20:55:00 GMT -5
Researchers at the University of Southampton (England) have found that constant kneeling in prayer can cause arthritis of the knees. The study of 2,000 people found that excessive kneeling strains the knee, increasing wear of its cartilage. Most at risk are vicars, priests and nuns, the study said. (Reuters) ...While you’re down there, ask for money to pay for joint replacement surgery.
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 20:56:41 GMT -5
A thief snatched a bag from a train in Reading, west of London, England, but paused after he got outside the station to look inside. He found enough explosives to make several bombs — he had apparently ripped off a terrorist group. He ran away, screaming, “It’s a bomb, it’s a bomb!” Scotland Yard’s anti terrorist team disposed of the explosives, while a witness observed, “I think he’ll think twice about nicking bags that aren’t his again.” (Reuters) ...The witness originally thought the guy had found a videotape of “Last Action Hero”.
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 20:58:03 GMT -5
The Nike sportswear company has won a temporary sales ban in Britain against two Spanish firms from marketing a perfume called “Nike”, saying customers would assume it was made by the shoe company. A trial will determine whether the ban should be made permanent. (Reuters) ...Yes, I like women who smell like gym shoes.
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 20:59:35 GMT -5
Ted Ridings, 79, was touring the British Museum when he spotted two stone faces, billed as 2,000-year-old “Celtic carvings”. But he remembered that his brother, Leslie, had carved the stone heads in 1939, making them to resemble Benito Mussolini and Adolf Hitler. Embarrassed museum officials removed the carvings from the exhibit. (Reuters) ...Now, about that ancient “Walkman” found at Stonehenge.
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 21:02:27 GMT -5
To protect sea turtle hatchlings making their way to the surf from their dry-land nests, the U.S. Fish and Wildlife Service has ordered vehicles off the beaches in Daytona Beach, Fla., between the hours of 8:00 a.m. and 7:00 p.m. But local residents are in an uproar, saying that the economy of the beach area needs the daytime traffic to survive. “I’m sick and tired of tree-huggers and Bambi-ites,” said George Locke, a member of the Beach Trust Commission, a county advisory board. “I like turtles, I used to eat them before they were protected,” he said. Fish and Game officials threaten to close the beaches entirely during the turtles’ mating season if the county doesn’t do more to safeguard the hatchlings, which are protected under the Endangered Species Act. (AP) ...Hey, you got any more of them Bald Eagle-
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 21:04:23 GMT -5
Suspicious of the taste of the company coffee, employees of the Wire Rope of America company in St. Joseph, Mo., set up a secret camera. The resulting tape showed an employee who was “feuding” with other employees was using the pot as ...well... a pot: he was using it as a urinal. Not to worry, said the Kansas City health director: “A healthy person normally puts out relatively noninfectious urine,” though “from the aesthetic point of view, it’s gross.” (AP) ...And now all of the employees are pissed off.
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 21:05:31 GMT -5
In lieu of wedding gifts, a couple in London, England, is asking that guests instead place bets with a bookmaker in their name. If the bet pays, the couple will collect the winnings. “If not, we will still have a lot of fun,” the groom said. (Reuters) ...I put $500 down 10:1 that you would be divorced in a year. Good luck!
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 21:06:52 GMT -5
Another Brit couple didn’t even make it to the altar: Bill Langley’s fiancee Barbara called the wedding off, but he had already booked a two-week honeymoon trip to Barbados. Not wanting to waste it, he advertised for someone “feminine” to take Barbara’s place on the trip. While ...uh... consummation wouldn’t be required, “it is a honeymoon and it would be lovely if we got close,” he said. So far, 50 women have applied for the position. (Reuters) ...Great scam idea! Get me my travel agent!!
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 21:08:32 GMT -5
In a bizarre twist in a bizarre case, M. William Graybill, the judge presiding over the case of the Florida woman accused in the murder of “Lobster Boy”, her allegedly abusive husband who was employed as a carnival performer [Consider this a Divorce], has come down with tuberculosis, and 18 others in the courthouse have also tested positive for the disease. Another judge took over the case, and promptly reversed Graybill’s ruling that the woman could not claim self-defense in the case as an abused wife. The woman was found guilty of murder this week. (Reuters) ...Can a “movie of the week” be far behind?
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 21:09:31 GMT -5
Five hundred reserves from the Irish army were sent to the hospital when, apparently caught up in the heat of battle, they got a little carried away and suffered cuts, bruises, sunstroke and dehydration. But it wasn’t a war: they were performing as extras in Mel Gibson’s latest film, “Braveheart”, being shot in England. “The Irish Reserve Army don’t see much real action, so this could be the only chance they’ll ever have,” a military spokesman explained. (Reuters) ...I love the smell of single malt in the morning.
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 21:11:08 GMT -5
Consumer advocates are urging the ban of “Magic Scent” Crayolas — crayons with aroma capsules built into their wax — because the scents might entice children to eat them. Company officials insist that the crayons themselves don’t have much scent, but when used the aroma capsules burst and “only the pictures” smell, a company spokesman said. But then, some kids will be enticed to lick or eat the paper, retorted the director of a poison control center. (AP) ...Apparently, these guys have never seen what kids put in their mouths. Crayons would probably be better for them.
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 21:13:00 GMT -5
The World Health Organization and the European Commission invited the Scottish Prostitutes Education Project, a self-help group run since 1986 by and for ...well... professional women, to stage a three-day conference focusing on health issues related to prostitution. “This self help group has achieved a reputation as a world-wide center of excellence,” said Martin Plant, a consultant to the World Health Organization and a professor at Edinburgh University. He is also the Project’s vice chairman. (Reuters) ...Ah, the world’s second oldest profession: capitalizing on the honorable practitioners of the world’s first oldest profession.
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Post by The Watcher on May 16, 2005 21:14:00 GMT -5
The State Attorney of Ohio vows to appeal a federal court ruling which allows the Ku Klux Klan to display a cross at the Ohio Statehouse at Christmas. The state had not argued that the display would offend anyone, but that allowing it might give the impression that the state was endorsing Christianity in violation of the separation of church and state. (AP) ...That’s what I hate about the holidays now: they’re getting so commercial.
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